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I've been wanting to die. Perhaps this is what's saving me.

* This picture was taken during my first year of college.  August 2018 was the worst month of my life. Because what happened seemed to erase all my dreams in one moment, all my mother's dreams and hardwork, all my family's dreams. One minute, I’m starting to live out my dream of personal and professional growth, the next minute I’m losing it all and spiralling into the depths of despair, fear, and eventually thoughts of deaths. You see, I've always been an optimist with life. Despite my complaints or grumblings about many events, I've always had the overall mentality of "I'll get through it, this is only temporary." And for some reason, God has also been like that in my life. He'd solve it... always in the nick of time or He'd open a different door later down the road. I just had hope. But what happened on August 2018 and after that, challenged, changed, and destroyed almost all of that. Or maybe I'm reading it wrong. But this isn't a post

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